Director/Writer – Paul Schrader
Plot: A minister of a small congregation in upstate New York grapples with mounting despair brought on by tragedy, worldly concerns and a tormented past. -IMDB.com
Cast Character
Ethan Hawke ... Rev. Ernst Toller
Amanda Seyfried ... Mary Mensana
Cedric The Entertainer ... Rev. Joel Jeffers
Victoria Hill ... Esther
Philip Ettinger ... Michael Mensana
Michael Gaston ... Edward Balq
Bill Hoag ... Elder
Kristin Villanueva ... Nurse
Contains Spoilers
Thoughts:
Duty is one of the recurring themes of the movie, duty to country, duty to one another like the parishioners and duty to God’s creation, the environment. Starting out we see Toller, the reverend, doing maintenance checks but doesn’t want to bother Abundant Life (megachurch) for money. Abundant Life keeps First Reformed Church open since it’s mainly a tourist spot. His pride gets in the way it seems from asking for money, maybe a bit of jealousy since Abundant Life is a bigger church. Mary Mensana tells Toller about her husband who has been released from jail. This shot has many shots within a shot – the window panes the window, framed in between the two doors. It’s good composition. She reveals he wants her to get an abortion. She says he thinks it’s wrong to bring a child into this world with all its problems. Killing a child is worse than bringing one into our world.
Almost every shot in the film is completely stationary and still reminding you of a simplicity and lack of ostentation. The cinematography doesn’t call attention to itself. Mary hands Toller the tea but puts Michael’s on the table. You can read into that any way you’d like. Maybe it’s just the tea was too hot. Michael tells Toller that 1/3 of the natural world has been destroyed in your lifetime. We find out later his extremist views aided his conversion into eco-terrorism. Michael is putting his despair onto others and selling them short before they had a chance to see life for themselves. Toller finds their debate exhilarating probably because this is a real conversation unlike the boring sermons he gives. Toller reveals he talked his son into the Iraq War where he died. Toller’s father, Toller and Toller’s son were in the military. It was tradition. Toller insists that losing a child is greater than bringing one into the world. Toller tells him courage is the solution to despair.
Toller is an alcoholic but he lives a simple life. He is humble but has a bad temper with his ex-wife. He is celibate but eventually starts a relationship of sorts with Mary. He doesn’t seem to ask for collection money but he peddles souvenirs from the church to stay afloat. These are some of Toller’s contradictions.
Mary calls Toller to come over. When she gives Toller the explosive suicide vest some internet users think she is planting seeds in his mind for him to become an activist/eco-terrorist. I think that is a bit farfetched but you never know. He doesn’t snitch on Michael. Michael later sends him a text to meet him at the Westbrook Park, East Entrance at the Red Diamond Trail. Michael is found dead through suicide by gunshot. At Mary’s home they discuss some particulars about not talking to the police and under Michael’s laptop Toller finds an envelope – Michael’s Last Will and Testament.
At Michael Mensana’s memorial Toller is asked to spread his ashes at a local toxic-waste dump. He does his duty without complaint. The Abundant Life choir sing “Who’s Going to Stand Up and Save the Earth.” By Neil Young, a protest song that later angers Ed Balq. Balq doesn’t want anything political at the reconsecration. Toller sees right through the big business of Ed Balq but Balq calls Toller out and tells him look at his own life before criticizing others especially when Michael killed himself after Toller’s counseling.
Mary and Toller ride their bikes in the park trail. At home Mary asks Toller to box some of Michael’s possessions probably because it’s too painful to live through with the smells and memories. Toller asks Mary whether it will be pink or blue and she says blue (a boy). She asks him to pray with her and they hold hands praying. At home Toller learns that Balq Industries is the 5th biggest polluter in the world. Balq Industries donated $85,000 to Abundant Life Church. Balq is in bed with Abundant Life Church and greased the EPA or at least worked them for their favor. On the church sign Toller puts Will God Forgive Us?
At the doctor it’s revealed he has cancer and Toller sort of admit she drinks alcohol. The doctor tells him he needs to stop drinking. Toller is a functioning alcoholic. He insults Esther for being nosy and needy because she found out about the gastroscopy.
In his room his bed is made like military regulation considering he was a military chaplain. It shows how uptight he is. There is no decorations and no carpets. Maybe those are the rules or maybe it is a sign of humility and simplicity. The books he reads are of different peoples’ faiths (Catholicism) like G.K. Chesterton, Thomas Merton and mystical books like The Cloud of the Unknowing. He is openminded clearly. He looks at the explosive vest give to him by Mary.
At the graveyard Toller narrates:
“The nations raged but your wrath came and the time for the dead to be judged, and for rewarding your servants, and prophets and saints, and for those who fear your name, both small and great, and for destroying the destroyers of the Earth.” – Revelations 11:18
This above Bible passage is one of many that addresses the environment.
At Toller’s apartment Mary comes by unannounced, saying she is frightened. Her pregnancy is giving her extreme emotions she says. She tells Toller Michael was really strong because he was a listener and was kind. She tells Toller they would lay on top of each other fully clothed getting as much body-to-body contact, breathing in unison, and looking into each other’s eyes. Mary’s duality here is shown as a sexual being. According to one user (clarkcurtis3) on IMDB the camera never pans except on two occasions when Mary lays on top of Toller and they float through space – it’s a dream. The other occurrence was at the end involving Mary as well. He envisions nature then it turns to a tire field, factories, and deforestation. Everything comes from nature so these things created for profit are the morphing and degradation of God. Nature is probably the closest thing we have to God.
Mary is going to Buffalo. She tells Toller and he tells her not to come to the reconsecration because of the politics.
At Jeffers office, Jeffers says they’re concerned about him. He tells Toller Jesus was in a variety of places (moods and feelings) but he (Toller) is always in the garden, referencing the Garden of Gethsemane where Jesus experienced anguish and torture, while accepting his fate. Jeffers says, “Jesus doesn’t want our suffering. He suffered for us.” When Toller brings up the environment Jeffers turns his back on him literally not wanting to hear him showing he is part of the politics going on. Toller says we shouldn’t sin so God can forgive, we should pollute so God can restore? Jeffers tells him he doesn’t live in the real world, and reminds him indirectly money talks and bullshit walks. Quite something to behold considering he is the religious field, but he is being realistic.
Perhaps being with her or anyone you love is a glimpse of heaven. That is why he is dead at the end or maybe he didn’t drink the drain cleaner as literally shown in the movie. Lack of music in the movie brings us closer to the spiritual so that you can reflect on what you are watching. Only three times did I count the camera move so there is emphasis on the stillness and quietness, the meditative qualities of spirituality.
When asked directly about the meaning of the ending, Schrader himself said:
"I don’t have the answer. Both answers are correct. On one level, it’s a miracle. Grace descends and he’s saved from his suicidal ways. On the other hand, there he is in Gethsemane with the cup in his hand and he’s saying, 'Lord, please let this cup pass from me.' But he doesn’t, and he drinks it, and now he’s on all fours, purging out his stomach. And God, who hasn’t talked to him for the whole film, now comes over to him and says, 'Rev. Toller, would you like to see what heaven looks like? I’m going to show it to you, right now. I’m going to open the gates. It looks like one long kiss.' And that’s the last thing he sees.'"
(Jack Pooley)
The film is great although it’s hard to believe that Toller would become sort of an eco-terrorist at the end but it’s plausible. I recommend it fully. It isn’t a light movie but it’s rewarding. Multiple viewings are recommended. All the actors and actresses did a great job. The direction, writing, cinematography etc. etc. were all great. One of the best lines of the movie was, “Did Jesus worry about being liked?” Guilt and doubt flow into Toller as he wrestles with his faith. Did he try to kill himself to join his son in the afterlife? Maybe it was in the back of his mind.
Works Cited:
http://thefilmexperience.net/blog/2020/7/14/the-new-classics-first-reformed.html
https://www.vulture.com/2018/06/lets-talk-about-the-ending-of-first-reformed.html
https://www.spiritualityandpractice.com/films/reviews/view/28592/first-reformed
https://whatculture.com/film/first-reformed-what-does-the-ending-really-mean?page=7
https://www.thegospelcoalition.org/article/the-bad-religion-of-paul-schraders-first-reformed/
https://www.openbible.info/topics/caring_for_the_environment
